(From Harry Hull, SVBC Charter Member and Webmaster)

A very hungry and enterprising duck gets separated from his flock and lands in the pond of the grassy commons of a  small New England country town. He soon notices that across the street from the commons is a general store. It’s a very active place, this general store. He sees people going in empty-handed and coming out with bags of food and other less important stuff.

After a day or two of surveillance, the duck finds his courage and waddles into the store. The proprietor, a kindly old fellow, looks down at him from behind the long counter and asks, “How can I help you?”

The duck replies: “Quack-quack-quack— got any corn?”

The proprietor says: “No, I’m afraid not. No corn.”

The duck: [agitatedly] responds, “Quack-quack-quack-quack!” and he leaves the store disappointed.

The next day, the duck returns to the store, hopeful things might have changed.

The proprietor, somewhat surprised to see the duck again, says “Can I help you?”

The duck: “Quack-quack-quack—got any corn?”

The proprietor quickly replies: “No! We don’t have any corn! Sorry.”

The duck agitatedly retorts; “Quack-quack-quack-quack!” He leaves the store, again disappointed.

The next day, ever hopeful, the duck enters the store again.

The proprietor, again very surprised to see the duck; “Can—I—help—you”?

The duck says: “Quack-quack-quack—got any corn?”

The proprietor: [quite angry now] “Hey, like I told you before, we do NOT have any CORN! Now get out of here before I NAIL YOUR FEET TO THE FLOOR!”

The duck once again replies; “Quack-quack-quack-quack-quack!” and hastily leaves the store.

A few days go by. The duck is getting very hungry now, enough to overcome his fear of the proprietor and goes again into the store.

The proprietor, immediately annoyed to see the duck bellows, “YOU again….!”

The duck: [swallowing hard for a duck] “Quack-quack-quack—got any nails?”

The proprietor: [a bit surprised] “No, we’re totally out of nails.”

The duck: “Quack-quack-quack—got any corn?”